The Upward Funnel EP

by Butt Funnel

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credits

released September 28, 2008

Tracks 1 und 4 wrote by Butt Funnel
Track 2 music by Weird Al, lyric by Butt Funnel
Track 3 wrote by Well Hung Warriors

Produced und Engineered by Wolf Hardenhousen
All Songz Taped at Glass Studios in Bonn, Germany
www.buttfunnel.com

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Track Name: Donot Abortion
Take away their voice
Removing any choice
Freeing us from them
Makes the muffin moist

The hanger is not a choice
The babies you cannot abort
Americans living in sin
Killing your unborn kin

Out wiz z babies
And in wiz z unprotected johnson
In wiz z party
And inpeach z Lyndon Johnson

Abortion is so bad
Tell zis to your dad
If he does not comply
You shoot him in z eye

Bleach is not a choice!
Turkey basters are not toys
Americans living in sin
Killing your unborn kin

Out wiz z babies
And in wiz z unprotected johnson
In wiz z party
And inpeach z Lyndon Johnson

Out wiz z babies
And in wiz z unprotected johnson
In wiz z party
And inpeach z Lyndon Johnson
Out wiz z babies
And in wiz z unprotected johnson
In wiz z party
And inpeach z Lyndon Johnson
Track Name: I'm Thinking I'm Alone Now
Am I to blame for wanting to know my penis better?
It's wrong what they say
Man's best friend is not an irish setter

I pretend zat I am Spider-man
Shooting out my web into a kleenex
Please Mr. Penis don't put up a fight
I'm going to smack you and I'll whack you and I'll ask you please don't dribble on z floor

I think I'm alone now
Z beating in my pants is z only sound
So I play wiz my bone now
And pray zat no one hears all my private sounds

Looks at the gays
Zay know how to romance up your bratwurst
I'm not all for their ways
But truth is z pig inside z blanket

The climax will not bring you any harm
Gripping tightly on to the third arm
Wearing your grandma's dress and her lipstick will not guarantee your freedom in the family tree to be a highlander

I think I'm alone now
Z beating in my pants is z only sound
So I play wiz my bone now
And pray zat no one hears all my private sounds
Thank god I'm at home now
The taxi driver didn't like my purple crown
I'm on z cell phone now
Dialing up the butcher who sells meat by z pound

(did we run out of sample?)
(It's fine, z American wont notice)
(yeah, but tempo is not same)

I pretend zat I am Spider-man
Shooting out my web into a kleenex
Please Mr. Penis don't put up a fight
I'm going to smack you and I'll whack you and I'll ask you please don't shoot into my eye

I think I'm alone now
Z beating in my pants is z only sound
So I play wiz my bone now
And pray zat no one hears all my private sounds
Thank god I'm at home now
The taxi driver didn't like my purple crown
I'm on z cell phone now
Dialing up the butcher who sells meat by z pound
I think I'm alone now
Z beating in my pants is z only sound
So I play wiz my bone now
And pray zat no one hears all my private sounds
Thank god I'm at home now
The taxi driver didn't like my purple crown
I'm on z cell phone now
Dialing up the butcher who sells meat by z pound
Track Name: Mortal Kombats
Kano
Sub-Zero
Liu Kangs
Sonya
Kenny Chesneys
Billy Dee Williams
Da Brat

MORTAL KOMBATS!

Raiden
Scorpion
Johnny Cage
Arsenio Halls
Wilford Brimley
John McCain
Sarah Palin

Mortal Kombats!

People of the sun
Show me what you want
Be ready for me on your knees
People of the sun
Show me what you want
Be ready for me on your knees
Track Name: The Skidmark Memoirs (acoustic)
Zis is part of z skidmark memoirs
Ziz is part of z skidmark memoirs

oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!

It's z smell
Is it wafting oftward?
If it did do you know which way it went?
I cannot find it

oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!
oh-ho-ho
MEMOIRS!

Zis is not part of my fantasy

oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho
oh-ho-ho

La-la...